Is This The Last Time?

I’m pretty sure I’ve said this before, but 4.5 years old is my favorite age by far. There’s just something about this age that is sweet and wonderful and perfect and silly. Quinn has turned into the most awesome tiny human, and I absolutely love spending our “Quinn and Mumma” days together.

I’ve really started to make it a point to embrace our time together, and I constantly make mental notes of my favorite warm and fuzzy moments. I want to hold onto the memories of Quinn at this age and remember them the best I can. Even still, during these sweet moments, I can’t help but ask myself whether it’s the last time.

As Quinn gets older, there’s certain things that he’s physically too big for, like riding around on the bottom of the cart at Target. Pretty soon, he won’t fit there anymore.

Same goes for his stroller. He barely fits in it now, but when he asked me to take Murphy for a walk with the stroller this afternoon, I didn’t turn him down. (It was his code for wanting to take a nap on the walk.) I covered Quinn with “Geet” and “Noonie” (his blankets), and he fell right to sleep. Was this the last time?

And playing games. Ok, maybe Quinn will always enjoy playing games (I know Mal and I still do), but he won’t need us to read the rules and set it up. Quinn will need us less and less as the years pass, so it’s hard not to wonder if these moments are truly the last of their kind.

Before Quinn goes to bed at night, we always snuggle on his couch and “talk about our days.” Tonight, we chatted for a little bit, but he was fast asleep within minutes – his head on my chest and his arms draped on either side of me. Being a mom is awesome in so many ways, but these fleeting moments are so bittersweet.

I’m feeling nostalgic, grateful, and full of love as I finish this blog post and head to bed. I know when I’m with Quinn tomorrow, I’ll still wonder whether or not this is the last time, but I also know I’ll cherish and embrace it even more.

8 Comments

  1. I have a 10 (almost 11) year old son and I totally identify with this post. He is still SUPER snuggly and sweet but I keep waiting for it to end. But until it does I will enjoy every good night kiss and every minute that he rests his head on my shoulder or wants to snuggle next to me while he does his nightly reading.

  2. I love this post! “The days are long, but the years fly by”…….. I never really understood the expresssion until experiencing parenthood.

  3. My baby boy is almost 16 ….his older sisters are 21 and 19. They say he is babied …Maybe??? But, I do enjoy the occasions he comes into the bed at night and just wants to “talk” before bed …which I am sure is his way of stalling but I’ll take it since it’s not every night.

    The only time….I want it to really be THE LAST time ….. is while we are practicing his driving skills these days…hahaha! He has put a few gray hairs on this mama during those drives.

  4. Oh my gosh this post almost made me cry!! My daughter will be 5 in April….kindergarten registration has started…and I just want to cling on to her being little and snuggly!!

  5. What a sweet post, and so true. I have a 7 month old baby boy, and the first 8 weeks were so tough, but now it’s flying by. Someone just said to me that you never know the “the last time” is that you’ll do something with your child, as you’re referencing here. I try to remember that now when he’s cranky and fussy and focus on my time with him and my love for him, instead of getting frustrated.

  6. Someone once told me that you never know when it’s the last time until it’s over. Like rocking my daughter in her rocking chair in the middle of the night. Giving my son a bath. Carrying them on my hip while simultaneously cooking dinner. It’s so sad to be on the other side and think “I can’t remember the last time…”

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