A Letter to My (Almost) One Year Old Son

My First Year as a Mom: a letter to Quinn

I recently wrote a post for the new life insurance website Haven Life about my first year of motherhood””what I learned and what I loved most about it. The journey of motherhood is different for everyone, and I felt that the best way to convey this was through a letter to Quinn. I just wanted to share it with you guys!

My First Year as a Mom: a letter to Quinn

46 Comments

  1. Tina, your letter to Quinn is so precious! I love how honest you are. It’s truly inspirational to see how you remain positive and stay strong even during tough times. Quinn is lucky to have you as his mom.

  2. What a great post. I love anything Mango these days, I’d go for the Mango Peach, yum.

    Poor Murphy!! I hope he gets well soon.

  3. I teared up reading that. My daughter is only 4 months younger than Quinn, so it was always exciting to read your pregnancy updates and know what was coming next for me. The part about wanting to cry because you love him so much…I think I HAVE cried because I love my daughter so much. Being a mom is definitely the hardest, but the best, thing in the world.

  4. Perfect. And you know what’s wild? I had my second a few days after you had Quinn and I still felt all those things. And was.shocked that I could love her like her sister

  5. loved reading this. I can relate on so many levels. I feel I didn’t cherish the younger months too, I was consumed with how hard it was and how stressed I felt and the freedom I lost. it works itself out but thank u for writing something so honest Tina.

  6. Well your letter just made this pregnant girl cry. Love you as a mom and all your honesty. Keep being you!

  7. I related to your letter so much, especially the early days being a blur. Honestly, I think the newborn phase is wonderful for some people and difficult for others. My second baby was “easier” and slept more/better than my first born and yet i still struggled through the early months. Even having gone through it once before and knowing what to expect, and being much more confident, I still felt like I kind of “woke up” once she was 7 months old and sleeping through the night. And with each passing month it gets easier and easier.

    Not everyone is in love with the newborn phase and I had to stop feeling guilty about it and realize that its okay. Moms are only human and we can only do the best we can. <3

  8. Tina, such a beautiful letter! Thanks for sharing! I think the newborn stage is a blur for most moms. I had my second child 4 months after you had Quinn. I did find myself savouring the moments more than I did with my first, but it was still a blur. I think we can thank sleep deprivation for that!

    I related a lot to your early struggles with balancing everything. That was a huge adaptation for me too when I had my first. You’re doing great and Quinn is lucky to be so loved!

    I have to constantly remind myself to slow down and be present with my kids. They grow SOOOOO fast! I agree that the first year flies by at an insane speed!

  9. Beautiful letter!!!! I have an almost 4 year old boy, and 21 month old twin boys, and this letter brought me back to their first year. Honestly, I had trouble reading through your letter….fighting back tears! Babies are so special! Happy Birthday little handsome!

  10. Aw, what an honest and heartfelt letter. I agree with another commenter – not everyone loves the newborn stage, and that’s okay. I had a feeling when I read all those “getting my body back” posts you wrote during the first months of Quinn’s life. They sounded like a woman desperately trying to control the one thing she could (her body) during a time of stress and upheaval, not someone loving and savoring every minute of early motherhood. I AM one of those crazy people that loves the “4th trimester” and the thought of worrying about working out or getting my abs back when my daughter was a little baby was laughable, it wasn’t even on my radar! But now that my daughter is fully entrenched in the “threenager” stage (and ooh boy “terrible twos” have NOTHING on the threes!) I find myself spending a lot more of my free time training for triathlons, it’s a great stress reliever. 😀 And I can’t imagine the extra stress of breastfeeding making my baby sick, and the tough decision of putting such a young baby in daycare. It sounds like it was a really tough year for you – I hope things improve!

  11. So beautiful, brought me to tears thinking about my little bean. This is an amazing idea and I plan to do the same for my little guy. Thanks for sharing such a special letter.

  12. That is so special Tina! Thanks for sharing it with us and for being so honest. So happy for you and Mal (And Murphy!)

  13. I rarely comment but just had to after reading your letter. What a beautiful, genuine, and honest letter. Thank you for sharing that! I currently have a 4 month old and relate is so many ways – from the decision to recently give up breastfeeding (medical reasons too), to wishing time would speed up during some of the early weeks (I wish I had savored it all more!) but most of all, that deep powerful all consuming make you cry at any moment love. It’s just the best. Happy birthday to Quinn and thanks for sharing your journey over the past year!

  14. Love this letter. Our sons our 2 weeks apart and every time I watch my son sleep I cry because I just love him so much! 🙂

  15. Your letter brought tears to my eyes. I felt the same way about all of my boys. What a precious gift our children are!

  16. Great letter! It was really sweet. I wish you had been more transparent during your postpartum months that you were struggling. I am going to be a new mom myself in a couple of months and I think that honesty would really help others. I hate how most blogs I read are all sunshine and sometimes its nice to read that other people struggle too. I think a lot of people could relate, for sure!

  17. What a beautiful letter Tina! It definitely made me emotional thinking about my almost 7 month son. I feel regret for not embracing those first three months 🙁 I just remember wanting to heal and feel myself again and get through the newborn stage. Between unsuccessful breastfeeding, trying to pump at 3am to keep up my supply and crazy emotions due to lack of sleep, those first three months were so tough!

    If we do decide to have a second child and are blessed with the opportunity, I will certainly put less stress on myself. Happy Mom = Happy Baby

  18. Anyone have the real link to the letter? I can’t read it when it is a “bit.ly” link 🙁 My computer blocks those

      1. @Tina: Thanks! What a beautiful, real, honest and heartfelt letter. You are a wonderful Mama and even though I don’t know you guys, I’m pretty sure you are well loved!

  19. Your letter was wonderful and I found a lot of comfort in it. I have talked to my husband about a lot of the same issues you experienced, but never another mom for fear of judgment. It sure was a nice sigh of relief to read you felt the same way. I had such a hard time postpartum that I was secretly craving going back to work for a needed break. Now that Lena is almost 4-months and in a good spot (we too worked in formula which made a world of difference) I am just SICK daily with mommy guilt over the fact I wished away my 10-weeks with her on maternity leave. It was soo hard being an exclusive pumper and a husband who travels during that time… I never thought I’d make it out alive. Now that we’re in our new normal I wish I could have those 10-weeks with her NOW. Oh mommy guilt.
    Thank you for your honesty!

  20. Tina – this brought tears to my eyes…… you are such a wonderful and caring Mom…. Happy Birthday to Quinn… he is a very lucky child to have you and Mal as parents…..

  21. Bring on the waterworks! My little girl turns one in august and I think we can relate to 100% of your first year together. This was beautiful, thank you for sharing!

  22. ” I guess it’s almost like a confession: Between the never-ending feedings and non-exist sleep, I didn’t savor your newborn moments as much as I wish I did. Honestly, I was so exhausted, I just wanted time to speed by. ”
    I think this is true for pretty much everyone. I know it was for me! Thank you for having the honesty to put it out there.

  23. Definitely teared up when you said that you feel so emotional holding Quinn. My baby boy was born 2 weeks after yours and I feel the same way. I just hold him and stare at him trying to literally suck the moment in. One day they will be big boys and not want to be held!

  24. Thanks for sharing such personal thoughts. I love reading Quinn updates as my son is just a few months younger. Your letter made me cry and now I want to write one too. Thanks for the idea. I am sure Quinn will love reading it when he’s older.

  25. I love your letter to Quinn, totally crying like a baby!!
    You’re an amazing momma and you have a wonderful family. Wishing you all the best. xoxo

  26. That was so heartfelt I teared up reading it. Those early baby days are something I remember vividly even if I don’t remember what I had for lunch yesterday. Thank you for sharing and for always being honest. You have made yourself a beautiful family and you should be proud!

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